i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize