do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
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