covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
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