Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize