It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
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