With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Randomize