I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
third nipple confirmed
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Randomize