Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
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