Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
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She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
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I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
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