All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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