i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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