he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
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