o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize