Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize