omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
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