the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Randomize