Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
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