from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
Randomize