He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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