tell your sister to shave her snatch
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
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