I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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