one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
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