my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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