this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
my poor anus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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