erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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