Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(330): View more from Ohio

I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.

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(330): I would have at least made out with you if you were showered. http://tfl.nu/yd8o

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(925): View more from California

I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.

(916): View more from California

You're drunk. Make complete sentences.

(925): View more from California

It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.

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(925): I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it. (916): You're drunk. Make complete sentences. (925): It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand. http://tfl.nu/78xl

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(859): View more from Kentucky

Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.

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(859): Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive. http://tfl.nu/9k83

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(707): View more from California

he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting

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(707): he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting http://tfl.nu/k7m6

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(240): View more from Maryland

He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...

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(240): He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me... http://tfl.nu/wuq4

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(573): View more from Missouri

just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch

(636): View more from Missouri

Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?

(573): View more from Missouri

IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation

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(573): just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch (636): Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving? (573): IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation http://tfl.nu/yr3e

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(303): View more from Colorado

If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take

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(303): If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take http://tfl.nu/wz90

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(304): View more from West Virginia

what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?

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(304): what's not responsible about a pool full of beer? http://tfl.nu/7inf

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(519): View more from Ontario

you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..

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(519): you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism.. http://tfl.nu/640h

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(310): View more from California

Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?

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(310): Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow? http://tfl.nu/9403

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.

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(412): So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt. http://tfl.nu/8gk3

Replies (2) Good night (386) Bad night (1058)
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(304): View more from West Virginia

I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.

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(304): I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home. http://tfl.nu/3pgq

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(650): View more from California

The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad

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(650): The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad http://tfl.nu/ulr7

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(760): View more from California

Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away

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(760): Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away http://tfl.nu/rpjr

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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.

(1-306): View more from Saskatchewan

I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..

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(306): I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights. (1-306): I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year.. http://tfl.nu/9s2f

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