i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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