He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
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