what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
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