Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
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