i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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