Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
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