Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
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