porn star boner night. come get it.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
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