i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
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