i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
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