Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
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