Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize