Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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