It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
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of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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