It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize