He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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