theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
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