I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize