I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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