Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
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