I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize