Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
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