...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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