Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Randomize